Pre-Overt
There has been a lot that has brought me here today. I have currently been doing therapy for the past few years under my parents insurance but unfortunately in a few weeks will no longer have that opportunity.
There was a lot of abuse and tough parts of my childhood. My family did not accept who I was and there was abuse that made things very difficult. My family has come to accept my decision a bit more but I still fight through depression and tough feelings with some of them.
I have experienced depressive thoughts and anxiety since I was a teenager. The first time I remember really understanding what I was feeling was at about 14 years old. I have struggled with social anxiety as I have gotten older, but have never had an official diagnosis of that.
With the steps that I have been able to make, I look forward to continue therapy so that I can heal to greater degrees in my life moving forward. With insurance not covering my therapy anymore, I can barely make ends meet as it is and it will not be an option for me without help going forward.
During Overt
I’ve been nervous about this but I think I am ready to start. I am working on practicing my boundaries in conversations that could be hard.
We have been discussing my history of feeling like an inconvenience throughout my life. I feel that it helped me recognize where some of my goals may fall when it comes to working on areas of my life. I can already feel that my thoughts are more positive and happy.
I am learning to make conscious decisions instead of letting the subconscious take over.
I’ve gotten the chance to spend a lot of the time ranting about my feelings with my dad after some things that came up this week. It has felt good to get those feelings out.
The last few sessions my mood has been really good and I have felt encouraged walking out of them. I think things are improving in my mental health.
We were able to discuss how the journaling for my sessions has been going, how it is benefitting me, and how it will continue to benefit me once we implement more journal entries. We discussed a good range of information about what the future is going to start looking like for me.
Post Overt
I started working on some behaviors that I have been journaling about. It has helped me to feel more in control of my environment, schedule and decisions. I have been making decisions for myself even if it is different than another persons decisions. It has helped me to see that by me picking things that I want, I am not an inconvenience to those around me. I know therapy will help.
Stick with loving yourself. At the end of the day, you are going to bed in your own mind and with yourself. Live to make yourself happy and proud over others or the society around you. You are worth the space that you are taking up. You being here does not make you an inconvenience. Start making decisions for yourself because they are what you want. Prove to yourself that you deserve that space and time in the world. The more you practice it, the more you will start to live it.