Trigger warning: Suicide
I suffer from many different mental health problems but my main issue is PTSD and depression, though I also have Asperger’s and anxiety. My PTSD mostly started when I was 8 years old, my uncle hanged himself Infront of me and my cousin’s who was also 8, at 10-11 years old I was abused by a 13 year old boy, he made me do some sexual things with me and made me do things like cut my wrists, hips and ankles and also send him nude images to him and he also sent images of him and older/much younger men, if I ever tried to resist he would punch, kick, push and do more gruesome forms of punishment to me, when I was almost 12 he finally decided he wanted me to have s*X with him and that’s when it crossed the line with me, I ended up having to run from his house makes and asking a woman passing by for help and to call the police, I got a teen restraining order against him (which wasn’t enough in my opinion but they couldn’t really do much more seeing as we were so young) you may think it’s stupid that I talked to him in the first place but he was my friend (or so I thought) for 2 years and I was in a very Vunerable time in my life where I was depressed and I loved the thought of someone wanting to see my body, I’m currently nearly 15 and my PTSD has gotten worse and I’ve gotten very suicidal but I’m currently getting therapy 2 times a week and am on medication and get check ups every 3 weeks by a doctor to see if I have any more cuts or if my body is getting weaker, if I’m eating enough ect. Also my doctor said the reason my PTSD is so severe is because there is a couple of things that have happened that could give most normal people PTSD anyway and my anxiety takes in everything as a bad thing so if even a little bit goes wrong in my life my anxiety could take it as a terrible thing and make me have panic attacks and make my PTSD triggered, I would love for some support